#2

Stalker

By Kazz Falcon

The first time I saw him, I became infatuated with him

From that moment on, I wanted him to be mine

He was forever my valentine

He doesn’t know I exist

I followed him everywhere from afar

I loved him since I saw his beautiful eyes at the bar

Isn’t that a little sickening bizarre?

It really isn’t, I admired him very much

There wasn’t anything wrong

I wanted him for so long

I didn’t have the nerves to introduce myself

He was too good looking; I wasn’t his type

Damn! Why doesn’t he look at me?

I was much better for him than anybody else

No man could love me as I could

Since he doesn’t pay that much attention to me,

I would be on his tail

He still hasn’t reply to all my mail

I wondered why

He wasn’t that shy

He dances with the other men in public

He can’t do that anymore

He’s mine, mine, and forever mine

That does it! I would follow him everywhere

The Guilty One

By Kazz Falcon

I confessed I commit a crime

What happened to love takes time?

The hatred I had for my ex lover

From heaven to hell, it really moved the earth

The pain cried from within

Why couldn’t he love me even more?

He shouldn’t left me for another man

Caring for him, loving him was such a good plan

He tossed my feelings into the lake

He passionately hurt me

He claimed he has fallen out of love

It was a shame; he didn’t give our love a second chance

God, I can’t believe it

He gave up on our love; it angered me a lot

So much, I want to do something drastic

His new lover would die alone in this world

I sought our for my revenge

I brought a gun to end their love

I ought to listen to my inner being

But the anger controlled the deadly situation

May God help them both

At the end, I pulled out a gun

He died I his new lover’s arm

Ragu Religion

By Kazz Falcon

I found God again

I could smoke pot in his honor

I should play the drums

I would be high as God in the heavens

Now, I have a drug dealer

I served God by doing drugs

The federal officers can’t close them down

The law was on their side

Everyone would show up for Sunday morning

I worshiped God through the drugs

Why can’t every religion be like that?

There won’t be any fighting among the Christians

I must see things clearly

I have the power of God in the drugs

Therefore, I should be more open minded

I never thought a drug could be so religion

It gave “God is my drug” new meaning

I ought to love God even more

I brought so much drugs to get high on God

I fought to be a Christian through the drugs

I sought out the Ragu Religion

The Religion Drug

By Kazz Falcon

I ran out of drugs for church

I took a drive to my drug dealer

I brought a good amount

It would last me for weeks; God would be pleased

I went over to the church at night

I didn’t make it all the way

The police stopped me on the freeway

I went a little to fast, I was running late

I didn’t want to miss church

They noticed something smelt funny

I want so badly to hop like a bunny

They ordered me out of the car

They found the drugs in my front pocket

I tried to explain that I do drugs for God

I cried when they handcuffed me

It fried me that they didn’t believe the truth

I mentioned the law was on my side

They just laughed out loud

For doing drugs, I wasn’t that bright

I felt that going to jail wasn’t right

I wondered what happened to the power of the light

It was time to call it a night

Looking At Myself

By Kazz Falcon

The mirror doesn’t lie

I took a good look at myself

I didn’t like what I see

I became grossly ugly over the years

I forgot how it started

I felt like I was forever the ugly duckling

I was so insecure about my looks

I was uncomfortable, my looks wasn’t all that

I tried to hide my looks

I cried that I was ugly

The mirror was my sworn enemy

I wore long sleeve shirts

I even don’t show my legs

I covered up every part of my body

I was much safe in clothes

I could go anywhere; no one would look at me

I can’t swim, but I know how to swim

I wouldn’t dare to go swimming in public

Everyone would know I was pretty ugly

I would rather have fun in the bathtub

I was much safer there than the swimming pool

I must wear long sleeve shirts at all times

I looked in the mirror again

Nothing changed - I was still ugly

No matter what, the mirror doesn’t lie

Feeling Stupid

By Kazz Falcon

I was in class this morning, feeling stupid

The assignment was extremely hard

I was stuck against the wall

I had no such luck, I couldn’t play ball

I was a sitting duck; I was about to fall

I tried it once more

I cried that I didn’t understand it

I fried that the teacher wasn’t around

I failed once more

It was frustrating for me

By then, my brain was working overtime

The assignment became a bigger headache

I forced myself to do it

I was less successful so many times

I gave up; I want to leave the class

The teacher wasn’t paying attention to me

It was useless to get help

I still couldn’t do it

I felt powerless in class

I fell down on my ass

I knew I couldn’t do it

I was a slow learner

I was feeling stupid

Nothing

By Kazz Falcon

Everything

Anything

Something

Nothing

Couldn’t it be everything?

Couldn’t it be anything?

Couldn’t it be something?

Could it be nothing?

It must be everything I dream of

It must be anything I hope for

It must be something I really way

It must be nothing I care for

I shouldn’t want everything

I shouldn’t want anything

I shouldn’t want something

I should want nothing

My life was perfect the way it was

Then again, I haven’t had everything

I haven’t had anything

I haven’t had something

I have nothing

Freedom Again

By Kazz Falcon

I recently found a new place after two long months

I love the sound of it, my very own place again

It couldn’t come at a better time

I had enough of the damn shelter

There were so many rules; I didn’t have that much freedom

I didn’t get enough sleep; I woke up every day at 5:45 AM

Now, I could sleep in my own bed

I had so many sleepless nights; it was cold to sleep

I could relax more; it was about time too

I was happier once again; I had my freedom back

I could cook all types of food

Eating the food at the shelter wasn’t healthy

We mostly eat the same thing every few days

It wasn’t good for anybody, mostly chicken

I was sick of chicken; I never want to eat it again

I could watch my TV shows again

Will& Grace, soaps, Friends, The Simpsons and more

I hardly watch any TV there

They mostly watch sports or movies they rented

I could have a drink; they can’t hound me about AA meetings

They made me to go to AA about every day

Hello, I don’t have a drinking problem, I never did

I didn’t need to go, I was a control drinker

Thank God, I was finally out of the shelter

I would never go back, I had my freedom again

Damn! Not Again

By Kazz Falcon

I had money problems over two months

Living on my own again was much harder than I thought

I wanted to get a second job, but I can’t

My job takes up most of my time

By the time I get off the bus, it would be bedtime

I need to fix up my place in my lifetime

I can’t afford a bed, couch or TV

The rent was too high

I really love the neighborhood

It was worth the rent in West Hollywood

I didn’t want to pass up the apartment

It has a Mountain View, cable & Internet ready and more

I lived by the grocery store, bus lines, church and the clubs

What more do I want?

I was satisfied except for one big thing

My job was far away; it was two hours on the bus

I was always tired

I just wanted to relax on my day offs

A roommate sounds like a fabulous ideal

Like I said earlier, I don’t have time

I can’t interview anyone for my roommate

I prayed that being homeless again is not my fate

I was doing the best I could

I didn’t like the shelter at all

I didn’t get enough sleep

It made my life a living hell

I feared I would be homeless again

I believed I left too early, not enough money I saved

Rock Bottom

By Kazz Falcon

I felt like a fool, I drank my life away

I thought it was cool; it didn’t turn out to be that way

I had everything at my feet

The drinking was a huge defeat

Boy, I was wrong

I wasn’t that strong

I believed I could handle my drinking

It turned out that my money was shrinking

It burned me that I lost control of my life

I felt someone stab me with a knife

I lost everything, as the drinking got bad

It also cost me my wife, I was sad

For the fool I was, the bottle was my downfall

I couldn’t look at the truth; I was small

I truly love my drug - alcohol

Then again, it had me against the wall

My life continued downhill

I won’t completely stop till

Rehab Center

By Kazz Falcon

I had enough of my drinking

It wasn’t do anyone or me any good

I completely lost faith in everyone

I destroyed their trust

In their eyes, my friendship became a dust

They didn’t bother with it any longer

They kicked me out of their lives

I licked my wounds

I wasn’t successful kicking the habit on my own

I was tied down to my drinking

I cried that I failed me so many times

Doing it on my won wasn’t working

It fried me that I couldn’t stop

I tried my best

I had no one to turn to, not even my family

I looked into my soul of the heart

It took a beating as I searched for the answer

My outlook changed everything

The heart collapsed, my body aches

I couldn’t bared to keep on living that life

I wouldn’t dare to continued drinking

I promised I should seek help at a rehab center

Relapsed

By Kazz Falcon

I was attraction to this guy

He felt the same way

He was taken away by my love

I showered him with love and gifts

He has never met someone like me before

To my loving heart, he opened the door

My alcoholism couldn’t be ignore

He wanted to love me no matter what

I have been sober over four months

We were quite pleased with my success

So far, so good, my life wasn’t a mess

Not so fast, problems begun to creep up slowly in my life

Someone stabbed my lover with a knife

The doctors couldn’t save him; he quickly died

I felt the pain in my heart

It was a crushing blow

My mother recently passed away a short time ago

The boss laid me off; the business was slow

I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown

All those dreadful things made me to frown

I lost so many at once

I couldn’t deal with it

The pain wouldn’t go away

I wasn’t all that gay

All this time, I wanted a drink

Why now? I didn’t want to see a shrink

Nobody could help, me life was destroyed

Somebody knew I relapsed

Lost So Many

By Kazz Falcon

This past six months became too emotional for me

It seemed like when my life get better, it get worse

I couldn’t remain sober

I finally relapsed

I should drink, but the pain was extremely hard

I wouldn’t be able to handle it alone

My life had fallen apart

With a knife, someone killed my sweetheart

My mom had a heart attack at the local mart

I lost my job; it wasn’t smart

My boss warned me that business would be slow

Across the nation, September 11 was a crushing blow

I could look for another job

My lover should be alive

It was my fault

It was my ideal that he work at night

The nighttime was an easy target for any homosexual

Then, there was my mother

We were so close; she loved my boyfriend a lot

She was like a second mom to him

His family disowned him at an early age

I really hate my life right now

Why do all good things must end?

I can’t go on, suicide is tempted

God, I need another drink,

I want to forget the pain and the troubles

I lost so many

Hate Crime

By Kazz Falcon

The weather was beautiful in the summertime

I decided to go grocery shopping at nighttime

It was extremely hot in the daytime

Without thinking, I took an alley shortcut

Some young men made their strut

I looked at one of their fabulous butt

They noticed it and called me a faggot slut

I flipped them off

I went on my merry way

It angered them; they weren’t that gay

As fast I could, I ran away

The hoodlums caught up with me

They taught me a lesson - Gay wasn’t cool

I know better, I wasn’t a fool

From a back pocket, he took out a tool

I feared for my life

Another one brought out a knife

I sought a way out of the mess

I thought long and hard about the deadly situation

I was in the corner; I fought for my dear life

Someone caught them beating up on me

He called 911

They fled with my wallet

We explained to the police what happened

They weren’t any help at all

They believed they robbed me for me wallet

All I can say, gay bashing is a hate crime

The Power Of Attorney

By Kazz Falcon

My lover doesn’t want to stop drinking

Even when I was homeless, he still drinks

I won’t let him to move in with me

I was truly fed up with his drinking and him

My friend gave me a brilliant ideal

Why not get power of attorney on his behalf?

He can’t say a damn thing

The power of attorney was my powerful sword

I must somehow let him to sign over his rights

Trust me, it won’t be easy

Then again, his drinking might be the key

That wouldn’t be hard

He could get so freaking drunk

He would sign his life away

After I get the power, he wouldn’t be so gay

He should get on his knees and pray

Fat chance!

God wouldn’t save him from me

I got to do what I got to do

Then the real power comes into play

I could ruin his life like he done mine

I wasn’t that type of a person

Instead, I would use the power of attorney

The Power

By Kazz Falcon

It was about time I got the power

I would take down the misery tower

He won’t ruin my life

He signed his life away

It made my day

It was time to send him on his way

We took a ride along the beach

For me, it would be useless to preach

He thought nothing of it

It was the two of us, having fun in the car

I was being quite about the whole thing

I looked at my engagement ring

It wasn’t real as our love

Both died long time ago during his drinking

I tried to love him, but it became too much

I cried that he doesn’t want to help himself

I can’t be there for him anymore

I pulled up in the driveway

I showed him the way

He went ballistic; he couldn’t believe it

He didn’t want to go

I brought up the power of attorney papers

He ought to know by now

His life was forever in my hands

Maurice

By Kazz Falcon

Maurice

Rest in Peace

From this world, his spirit was released

He died from being obese

His eating habit increased

His diet was too late; his weight didn’t decreased

From a heart attack, he became the deceased

Maurice

A Lover’s Betrayal

By Kazz Falcon

He vowed revenge for betraying him

It was his own doing

I looked out for me

It was a personal gain

He doesn’t see it that way

He believed I tricked him to sign the papers

What else can I do?

The power of attorney was in our best interest

He doesn’t want to stop drinking

Due to his alcoholism, our love was shrinking

He did everything in his power to mess up our lives

Now, I have the power to fix our lives and maybe our love

He made excuses to stay out of rehab

He got a new job

They can wait for him

He lived with his family, he “moved” in with me

His AA meetings, he doesn’t take them serious

Hmm, the way I see it

They would be there when he finishes rehab

No big deal at all

He vowed I would pay for ruining his life

I wasn’t worry or afraid

His past was a powerful weapon to use against him

He hasn’t had a prayer in the world to fight me

He must look on the bright side

The rehab was a new beginning for him

Why Did He?

By Kazz Falcon

My lover forced me into rehab

That bastard! I don’t have a drinking problem

Wait till I get my hands on his sorry ass

He would regret for betraying me the way he did

The power of attorney should be invalid

He tricked me for signing my life away

I was never drunk in anyway

In court, he would have his day

Right now, I was stuck in rehab

God, I can’t stand this place

I don’t belong here

I need to call my family

They would get me out

I didn’t give him any doubts

He should know better

He lived with me over two years

My drinking was never out of control

Did I ever hit him?

Hell, no

Now, it tempted to hit him

He ruined my life on purpose

Thanks to him, I lost everything

He even cost my new job at Hilton

That bastard! He would get his some day

Sooner or later, I would have my way

I resented him for destroying my life

He would pay with a knife

Why did he?

Target: Matthew Shepard

By Kazz Falcon

I noticed a guy entered my favorite place

He was friendly and trustworthy

I figured he was harmless but there was one thing I hate

He was a homosexual

I really despised them

Why did he have to come here instead?

There were other places to get a drink

If word gets out, the other faggots would show up

Then my favorite place would be their own

God, what a horrible thought

I can’t let it happen, I just can’t

I need to do something fast before it’s too late

It became my new purpose in life

It was fate

I can’t make a scene

Nobody would suspect a thing

So badly, I want to

Damn, I must be patience and wait for the right moment

Hey, that’s a great ideal

I could enlist my friend

He hates gays with a passion

I already got a sure fire plan in my mind

The thought of it wasn’t too kind

I could warm up to that faggot

He wouldn’t know what hit him

Somehow, I must gain his trust

Anyhow, that’s the key to Target: Matthew Shepard

Strangers

By Kazz Falcon

I met two guys at a club

They were friendly

We begun talking about anything

They offered to buy me another drink

I declined

I was driving

Two drinks were enough for me

They mentioned they didn’t had a ride home

Out of the kindness of my heart, I would take them

They claimed a couple more drinks wouldn’t hurt

They lived close by

I stupidly agreed, I had a few more

The last one really hit me

I was blasted

Somehow, I made it to a car

I figured they could spend the night with me

They pulled up somewhere

I got out of the car

I realized it wasn’t mine

I had no ideal of where I was

It was an open field

I was by the fence

They taunted me for being gay

It was too late

I couldn’t escape

They tied me up to the fence

I was badly beaten

I was frightened

I pleaded with them to stop

I thought they were my friends

I ought to know, never trust strangers

Reunited With Family

By Kazz Falcon

I finally got back in touch with my family

I haven’t seen them in a few years

They didn’t want any part of me

I gave them hell throughout the years

My parents threw me out of the house

From doing drugs, I was being a louse

They were so disappointment in me

They raised me better than that

I just wanted to do my own thing

I was too wild for them; I partied every weekend

I come home late, some nights I didn’t show up

They were so sick of my drug use

In my early 30’s, I got tired of the abuse

The drugs was taking on toll

I finally realized they were right about the drugs

Then it sunk in my heart

I missed my mother’s hugs

It warms my heart

I missed them so much

I turned over a new leaf

I burned for my family

I want them back

I just got out of rehab a few days ago

Going back home was a wonderful feeling to have

They were pretty impressed with me

I was blessed to be alive and have them in my life again

They were blessed to finally met their grandson

Flesh & Blood

By Kazz Falcon

My girlfriend wasn’t in the mood

I used drugs in front of the baby; she angrily stood

She lashed me out for being stupid

The baby was in extremely danger

I could accidentally give him some

Then the baby wouldn’t survive

Where would I be?

I probably be in jail for child endangerment

Anything bad could happen with a baby

She claimed I didn’t love them as much

I proclaimed they were my world

I would do anything

“Including giving up the drugs?” she asked.

For a minute, I pondered my life without drugs

My life was stress free

I was calmer

I had a pretty good job and an apartment

I was happier with my life

“Happy without us in your life?” she asked.

I just laughed, she was kidding

She put her foot down

I saw her sadly frown

She wasn’t playing around

The bell made a loud sound

I heard it loud and clear in my head

I can’t stand losing them

They were a major part of my life

I promised her I would give up the drugs

I flushed them down the toilet for my flesh & blood

Drug Baby

By Kazz Falcon

Hello, I was the worst mother ever

My doctor told me to stop using drugs - NEVER!

Please! My baby would be just fine

The drugs wouldn’t effect the baby in anyway

He warned me that the baby would be in grave danger - NO WAY!

Besides, I could stop anytime

He mentioned it ought to be a crime

Yeah, right!

He figured I wasn’t that bright

I just didn’t care

He tired his best to give me a scare

I cried out loud, I went into labor

It went over a day

I wasn’t that gay

The birth hurts like hell

I gave birth to a baby boy

Something was immediately wrong

Anything but that I feared

Nothing was further from the truth

I was ashamed of myself

I didn’t see my baby soon after the birth

I felt so much guilt in my life

I couldn’t believe it

The guilt was so strong

I never went to see the drug baby

Once Upon A Time

By Kazz Falcon

Once upon a time

I was a very nasty slime

It ought to be a crime

I like to rhyme

Before my bedtime,

I like to climb

Up a tree, it won’t cost me a dime

In the meantime,

I was a mime

In my lifetime

In the summertime

And springtime

Not the wintertime

I loved the warm weather in the daytime

This poem went overtime

It was time

To end it in my time

It was nighttime

Once upon a time

My Good Fortune

By Kazz Falcon

They threw me a loop

I couldn’t believe the scoop

In my pants, I almost pooped

There were so sure

We weren’t poor

It was my ideal to play the big money

For a cruise, I would take my honey

We were as gay as The Flintstones

Everyone congratulated us on the phone

Thank God! This wasn’t The Twilight Zone

First class to Hollywood, we flown

What the heck!

He handed my first check

From now on, our lives weren’t a major wreck

The Red Dragon

By Kazz Falcon

I was the most fearsome leader of the KKK

I ruled the South with an iron claw

I don't like the other kinds of people around here

The South don't take too kindly

The blacks, the Latinos, and the gays must not come

I want to get rid all of them from the South

Even I ran out some family members out of town

They were nigger loving bastards or some sort

Their kind wasn't welcome at all

We can't embrace them, except our own

If any white love them, they would be disown

I can't have that going on in the South

It wasn't right - not then, not now

The South should have won the civil war

We would have slavery for life

Thanks to Abe Lincoln, we lost some white power

It's up to the South to get all the power back

The North doesn't care about our country

With The South, the white power must rule at all cost

The federal flag was still above the USA flag

We mean business no matter what

No person can survive the alligator in the swamps

Everyone should be scare of the Red Dragon.

The Nigger

By Kazz Falcon

Hello, I’m a nigger

Most people in the South called me that

I’m really a black man

I just moved to the South, which caused a uproar

They didn’t like me moving into their territory

My grandpa was from the South, slavery and all

He didn’t have the freedom I do

My heritage was in the South

Grandpa work in the fields all day long

They work him like a dog - I had proof

It means so much of where we came from

We were sold into slavery by Africa for the white men

The only proof I had was the slavery necklace

All the times he was a slave, it was never take off

A few whites hated the blacks were slaves

They couldn’t do anything about it

Nothing has much changed since then

The blacks became free

The whites became power hungry

Since they lost power, they remained hateful to us, niggers

The KKK is still spreading hate all over the South

Where is the brotherly love?

God isn’t hate; the flesh doesn’t like their kind

The white power wasn’t worth to have

We supposed to be free everywhere

They still warned the niggers by burning the cross

The Nigger’s Death

By Kazz Falcon

The fellow KKK members went on a Lynch Mob

A black man accuse my son of stealing from him

That was the final straw

The nigger had no proof of the crime

How could he stop so low?

Then again, I wouldn’t be so surprised

He dragged the white man down

I let him had it in front of the whole town

They witnessed his murderous death

I hope it scared the other niggers to get out

If not, we would continue to use the white power

On the city halls, we torched the bastard

He burned to death on the cross

He hasn’t met Jesus Christ till now

The white Christians must do it right

Staying in the South, the niggers wasn’t that bright

By now, they should saw the light

It could happen to them

The death put the other niggers on noticed

We won’t stop till they leave the South

Getting rid of them is our sole mission

The niggers won’t infect the South any longer

We should protect our turf

His death was a reminder how deadly we can be

I can’t wait till the REAL South come back

We will continued to say “Niggers, slaves,” not black

Burning Cross

By Kazz Falcon

I was sleeping in my bed with my wife

My two kids was safely in their beds

Something crashed through the window

It startled my family and me

The wife checked on the kids

I ran down the stairs

I found the threatening rock with slurs

I heard the gruesome sounds coming from the outside

It was disturbing; my family came down

I peaked through the window; it made us frown

A cross was burning, the KKK walked around it

Our stomachs turn inside and out

Their hatred was too much to take

They yelled, “”Go back where you come from.”

As I recalled, the white people brought us as slaves

Therefore, we belonged here and we are now free

Like MLK said, “Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

Why can’t they take it with a grain of salt?

I won’t move my family out of town

No KKK can force us at all

The South was my home, ours for life

They can kick us down

It would make us stronger; I won’t frown